Initial Disclosure Intensive
Disclosure is the sharing of the true and complete story of what someone has done in violation of their connection to themselves and their relational contract, processed and presented therapeutically. An Initial Disclosure Intensive is a concentrated, therapeutically guided experience designed to help relationships walk through the facts of a pattern of problematic sexual behaviors, infidelity, betrayal, or deception. It focuses on the “what” — the true and complete story of what took place — so that the relationship is no longer built on partial truths or secrecy. The goal is to share truth, rebuild trust, and decrease shame.
This work is grounded in the Connected Recovery® model, which organizes the disclosure process around four “letters”: the What Letter (what they did), the Why Letter (how they arrived at that point), the Impact Letter (the story of how the person who has been betrayed has been affected), and the Amends Letter (acknowledging the pain and sharing the concrete steps being taken to repair the harm and prevent it from recurring). The full disclosure process typically unfolds over one to two years; the Initial Disclosure Intensive centers on the What Letter — the essential foundation of truth upon which all the later work can safely rest.
Part of our role is to help the person who has been betrayed sort through their questions. It is never their responsibility to ask exactly the right questions in order to receive complete information — that responsibility rests with the person disclosing. This matters because of what psychology calls the Zeigarnik effect: the mind’s tendency to return, again and again, to what remains unfinished. Unanswered questions and partial truths become exactly that kind of unfinished business — intrusive and hard to set down. A complete disclosure, rather than a piecemeal one, allows the mind to move from preoccupation toward resolution and gives the relationship a whole story to stand on.
Most Initial Disclosure Intensives are a 3-day, in-person experience at our Highland Village, Texas office. On Day One, Dr. Brian Martin and Dr. Laney Knowlton work with the person who has betrayed to build a timeline of behaviors. On Day Two, both people meet with us and the information is shared in an interactive conversation that includes answers to the questions of the person who has been betrayed. Day Three focuses on initial processing and setting up structure moving forward. While the process is structured, each intensive is individualized for the clients involved.
For our Initial Disclosure Intensive pamphlet, click here – NorthStar Disclosure Intensives Info Pamphlet.